Thursday, February 10, 2011

The Bike Incident: A Gina and Frank shennanigan. (circa 2006)

When I moved to Miami, I brought my bike with me.  It was a lovely Diamondback lightweight aluminum and graphite body fit perfectly for me.  I chose it because of all the features being easy on my neck injury and my ability to manipulate it with relative ease.
Anyhoo, for close to 2 years I rode the bike without incident.  When I would get home, I would always lock my bike to the rail on the entrance to my apartment building.  Because the bike was relatively easy to lift, I was able to fasten it to the rail, elevating it from the ground.
One day I came downstairs from my apartment to go for a bike ride and lo and behold, my bike had been stolen. I have my ideas about who stole it and why but that is another story and not really relevant here.
So a few days go by and I am upset about my bike.  It was pretty expensive and now I had no bike.
I was sad.
Frank Daddy was living with Yvette in the apartment across the street from mine at the time.
At around 2 in the morning Frank calls me to see if I want to go to Walgreen's with him for a snack run.  I wasn't really doing anything so I say okay and meet him in front of his building by his car.
We go to Walgreen's and buy our junk food.  Frank buys a large candy bar.  The kind you get at the movie theater.  It was ridiculously large and filled with caramel. And some sort of soda pop, most likely diet.  bleh.
Arriving back at Frank's he asks if I wanna come watch a movie.  I decline and head back across the street to my place.  As I do this I see our local crack head riding down the middle of the street on, you guessed it, MY BIKE!!  I couldn't believe it!!!
I shouted to Frank, who was just climbing the stoop to his building. "My bike!! My bike!!" I kept yelling.
"Frank, it's my bike!!!"
Well the crackhead stops immediately about 2 yards from me.  I realize he only did this because he saw Frank lumbering over and noted Frank's large stature - especially compared to his own.  He got off the bike and faced me.  I explained that my bike had been stolen earlier in the week and that this was MY bike.
He swore he just paid 20 bux for it and had no idea about it being stolen or not.  The whole time he keeps looking nervously at Frank who is just standing there eating his ridiculously large candy bar, not saying a word. 
I continue the exchange with the crackhead.  I tell him I have the registration papers upstairs and we can call the police if he'd like.  He assures me there is no need to bring the police into this.  I told him if I had 20 dollars I would give it to him for the bike but considering that it was now like 2:30 in the morning, I had no cash on me.  The crackhead decides this is all getting too weird for him and being quite skittish to begin with, he just takes off running down the street leaving the bike behind.
Okay, cool.  I got my bike back! =)
I start to wheel my bike back toward my building and Frank follows me, still eating that dang candy bar.
It was really a big candy bar.  I'm not kidding.
Reaching the steps of my place, Frank offers to carry the bike up for me.  I tell him not to bother I lift it all the time.  Frank goes up the stairs and holds the door open for me.
As I begin to lift the bike, one thing becomes quite apparent to me.
I say to Frank, "This isn't my bike. My bike wasn't this heavy."
Frank shrugs and I decide he needs to carry the bike upstairs for me.
Yes, we stole a bike from a crack head at 2:30 one lovely morning on Miami Beach.
I never rode the bike and it is now fastened to a fence in South Beach where it is rusting into oblivion because I can't find the key to the lock.
True story.


Anonymous said...

Geez Gina, you stole the poor guy's bike.

UberGina said...

it clearly wasn't HIS bike either.